I heard this one from Al Gore, keynote speaker at a Christian communicators convention, years before he became Vice President. (He was probably a hundred pounds lighter as well!) Cops come across a horrific accident where a car has smashed into a cow. The vehicle is badly damaged: hood crumpled, windshield smashed, air bags exploded. The cow is dead, and the guy driving the car is bleeding profusely, face bashed in, his busted arm hanging limply from his side. But when the cops ask, he keeps shouting: “I’m fine! I’m okay! Don’t worry about me!” “But what happened? What’s going on? And why do you keep saying you’re fine when you’re clearly injured?” Finally the guy explains. “I was driving along in the rain. This cow came lurching out onto the freeway and I accidentally hit it. Okay. A minute later, this guy in a pickup slams on the brakes, ready to help. He sees this injured cow kind of thrashing around, busted leg and all, and says to his wife: ‘Honey, hand me the shotgun; I’ve gotta put her out of her misery.’ Two seconds later, blam!! He shoots her stone-cold dead. Then he turns to me and goes: ‘Hey, mister! How are you doing?’ And I scream at him: ‘I’M FINE! BELIEVE ME, I’M FINE!’”
